Thursday, 23 October 2014

Some facts

Well long time no see bloggers and I never thought to have to revive blogging but it does seems a good way to state my side of  a story without interrupting the purpose of HCV forums,that is supporting people affected by HCV and not a platform to air your dirty laundry or speak falsehoods.
It is difficult to know where to start so let me ask you a question or two.How do you deal with someone that tells lies that are difficult to disprove? Awarkward situation really but put yourself in that position for a moment.All I can think to do is put my faith in the belief that the truth will always prevail and karma will take its toll.
If someone says they gave you money that was given to them for a worthwhile cause but didn't actually pass it on to you because at the time you were in no fit state to handle it,how do you remedy the contradiction? A similar thing happened to me when last year after a break up in my relationship.I took two deliberate overdoses,the second I was saved by the Samaritans,they called an ambulance for me,so after spending a few days in hospital I was out but still my mental health was unstable.I was also still under the influence of my ex,still wanted to be with her as I had yet to see her for what she really was.It was at this time somone gave her some money they had raised to help pay for a forum.She received the money but never passed it on as she always seemed to be busy or couldn't get to the bank for some reason,I wasn't particularlly bothered either as money had no interest for me,staying alive and perhaps reconciliation with her were far more up my list of priorities.This was around November.
Time passed on and she did seem to start to care about me,she helped me and I helped her. Getting towards Christmas she started to indicate that she would perhaps like to "explore" a new relationship with me.On the Thursday before Christmas she came to me looking all down and forlorn,her mind was troubled.She said she didn't want to spend Christmas with her boyfriend and his two other friends but wanted to spend it with me.I told her as it was so close to Christmas she really should make up her mind and tell these people as they had little time left to make new plans.She came to me the day after and told me she had a plan....she would tell her boy friend to pack his stuff (this would be Christmas day don't forget) as he would piss her off as he always does then she would come to me on Boxing day and we could start our new relationship,so the money thing wasn't even in the equation indeed I'd forgotten about it.Christmas day was the first one in my life that I spent alone eating a microwave dinner wasn't the best way to spend it hey Boxing day was going to be special.Boxing day came and she phoned me to say she had told him to pack and go but she was unsure about him and unsure about me,I told her to follow her heart.She text me a little while later saying she was going back to help him pack.I never heard any more from her.I waited until the 27th and text her,there was no reply,I phoned and no reply so I decided to call around there thinking the worse may have happened,I mean here she was with a man with tourettes that throws iPad across the floor in a fit of frustration.I went round and walked up the stairs as the music was loud,there he was palying happy families and she laughing and cleaning.I wasn't best pleased to say the least.I would treat an animal that way she knew I was "vulnerable".It was then I started to see her as a control freak verging on psychotic.It was around this time I asked her about the forum and what she wanted to do as she said she wanted to walk away as I did.She suggested just trashing the database and closing it down.I didn't like the idea of that as it can have some use.I suggested handing it over to someone that not only had the technical know how but also still had an active role in HCV indeed he still had HCV himself.Of course when I suggested this the ex went ballistic.
So as time drew on and I became more independent and actually found someone that was here on holiday from Australia, she really cared a lot for me and me her.It was good timing for both of us.The day after our first night together she asked if we could go down to Marazion and see St Michaels Mount.We parked up and started to stroll along holding hands and I spotted my ex just reversing into a parking spot with her boy friend so we walked across their path but I didn't acknowledge the fact I had seen them.They must have been taking the dog to the beach.Anyway it all started going pear shaped after this,she must have realised she had lost her control over me. She stopped contact which with hindsight was the best thing for me,gave me a chance to free myself from her.
She stayed away from the forum for quite a while but I started to go on as I thought it needed someone at the helm to lead it.She obviously didn't like that and came back on.I had already decided to seek help with the forum so I was in talks with Martin Bolton,he helped financially right away and agreed to take over should I require it.The rest is history.....
I have no need to go there and cause disruption airing my dirty laundry on a place that is supposed to be a haven for sick people.As for the money well of course she will swear black is white and she gave it to me,this brings me back to the beginning of my post here.How do I prove other wise,it's her word against mine and people will have to believe one or the other, there is nothing I can do.
I hated the way things were going with the forum,it was getting very corporate and business like.Imagine how much money was made from the sale of calenders alone.At £6.99 each and 100 ordered that generated £700 now take away the cost of printing,let's say around £350 that leaves £350 left and as the forum only costs £12 per month there was enough for 30 months.Add to that each time she got someone to do a research for some pharma company she would get £40 plus any work she did for the drug companies.That's why she wanted big numbers of members,it looked good to the pharma's.It was one reason why I wasn't online there much and wanted to back away,I didn't like the way it was going.I told people I was working on music projects,if the truth be known I wasn't happy with the way the "business" was heading.People have said why didn't I say something about the "donation" before well as I say above it wasn't until she had posted a thread in the hidden "Admin" section that there was enough money to keep things going for a while that I realised I was going to be stitched up by someone that very cleverly manipulates people and situations and her lies are difficult to disprove.I have an email that says "let's wait and see what other wankers donate first" when I did mention the donation..I mean here's a woman that sold a jointly owned caravan back in May and still hasn't given me my share or allowed me time to collect my personal belongings from the former home.A woman that has never paid tax or national insurance since setting up her cleaning business back in  2007.
Back in  May after she sold our caravan I got a garbled message that my grandson in Glasgow was seriously ill.I was desperate to get up there and swallowed my pride and called her to ask for some of those funds to get to see him,she refused unless I gave her forum back ,I couldn't do that as I didn't have access to the database,I was still admin but without the database you own nothing.I saw a friend and her neighbor after that call and they could see I was distressed and in bits,they offered to intervene I asked them not to.I did get an offer of a loan from someone I hardly know but on my over to collect it I got a message to say my grandson was okay.Pixie text me to say I could have £300 if I signed for it,the former neighbor had contacted her to tell her to stop being a bitch.She then sent another text calling me a liar because I didn't go to Glasgow and she called me a liar because I said I couldn't get her forum back.Compassion,she can't even spell the word nor does she understand forgivness.
Here's a woman that treated Ruby2 so cruely and did her utmost to prevent him going to Wales for a forum meet up and refused to allow him to come down to Cornwall because someone Ruby knew had been involved with some crime.She hated Ruby and called him a "druggie" in a derogatory manner(as she does with anyone that has used drugs).There are people out there that know how upset Ruby was by her attitude and actions yet when she pours out her sympathy they say nothing.She hated him and deep down despises any one that got HCV through drugs use.
I paid for that forum from its inception and toiled over the technicalities of it all so it wasn't just all Pixies hard work,I sweated too but people choose to forget that.I gave 6 years of my life to HCV. They think I was out for revenge by passing on the forum she told me she wanted to get away from.Revenge for what exactly? What did she do wrong that I would seek revenge? She just fell out of love and did me a favor by ending the relationship.My life is where it should be..into my music. Although it would be nice to get back what is rightfully mine and all the personal belongings I worked 30 years for.It just shows you what kind of a woman she is.She doesn't even want to got to mediation so in other words its time for court.Is that really the sort of person that should be the face of HCV? Search your souls and your hearts and tell me I'm wrong.She likes you all to think she has moved on but she hasn't.By holding on to what is rightfully mine she is keeping hold of the past and trying to keep control like she always does.
She is the worlds greatest control freak if ever I saw one.It's why she stopped eating meat, so she could have control over what she ate to spite her parents.She was treated cruelly as a child and she has kept the cycle going but she can't see that.
She spouts out about how much better she is being looked after and that I never did anything for her.Except buy her an 18ct Gold and diamond Rolex watch,take her to Cyprus for 2 weeks,take her to Amsterdam,take her to Cape Verde,pay deposits on cars for her...shit I even paid for her jaunt to Paris where she slept with another man but I forgave her.I came into the relationship with £65,000.00 she came in with less.I paid all the car insurances,road tax and many other things.
It's about time you sheeple woke up and smelled the coffee.

You didn't find it

Never mind better luck next time...all that juicy gossip that you just couldn't find.... you really are losing your touch Bob....;-)

Monday, 23 December 2013

Written for you...?

I remember well last year going out with her and she found this word rather funny but then again she was drunk and disorderly...even to the extent of laughing at some old guy with Parkinsons...saying to him...."Are you as pissed as me".....tut tut no self respect let alone compassion.....

I was also thinking back to this time last year when you said you were going to dump your boyfriend on Christmas day and come back to me on Boxing never showed up and didn't even send a text or give any explanation......I am glad you were talked out of it but it shows you can't make your own decisions and I wonder if he's beginning to realise that he has made a mistake....he's just another "sick" puppy that you can take in and try and help once you're fed up with him like all the others you'll just toss him aside.....

We must also be near the first anniversary of Ruby's there's a hot potato..there are people out there that know the truth about your hatred of him...there are people out there that had spoken to him in on the phone when he was in tears because you did your best to not let him go to a meet up in Wales...I wish those people would speak out and let the everyone know the real you....then you have spout out grief and anger and what he did....yet you learned should the same respect and compassion for me after two attempted suicides last have no compassion for anyone with a mental illness we're all just druggies to lack empathy and forgives and yet put this wonderful front up about how you do everything for everyone....and run it like a business making money on the backs of the sick.....

There's lots more to come.....have a great Christmas....I certainly will....... :-)

Like a Night Club in the morning, you’re the bitter end.
Like a recently disinfected shit-house, you’re clean round the bend.
You give me the horrors
too bad to be true
All of my tomorrow’s
are lousy coz of you.
You put the Shat in Shatter
Put the Pain in Spain
Your germs are splattered about
Your face is just a stain
You’re certainly no raver, commonly known as a drag.
Do us all a favour, here... wear this polythene bag.
You’re like a dose of scabies,
I’ve got you under my skin.
You make life a fairy tale... Grimm!
People mention murder, the moment you arrive.
I’d consider killing you if I thought you were alive.
You’ve got this slippery quality,
it makes me think of phlegm,
and a dual personality
I hate both of them.
Your bad breath, vamps disease, destruction, and decay.
Please, please, please, please, take yourself away.
Like a death a birthday party,
you ruin all the fun.
Like a sucked and spat our smartie,
you’re no use to anyone.
Like the shadow of the guillotine
on a dead consumptive’s face.
Speaking as an outsider,
what do you think of the human race
You went to a progressive psychiatrist.
He recommended suicide...
before scratching your bad name off his list,
and pointing the way outside.
You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart.
You’re heading for a breakdown,
better pull yourself apart.
Your dirty name gets passed about when something goes amiss.
Your attitudes are platitudes,
just make me wanna piss.
What kind of creature bore you
Was it some kind of bat
They can’t find a good word for you,
but I can...

Saturday, 2 November 2013

Shoddy goods in expensive packaging

All will be revealed....